How we change what others think, feel, believe and do
Guest articles > Celebrate
by: Ronit Baras
Celebrate! Any excuse will do.
It is a unique point in time when a person contemplates his or her purpose in life. When I was a kid, I had different reasons for being. I could not see the stream and I could not imagine the destination it could take me to. Staying in one place was a goal I spent a lot of energy on because it was easy and comfortable. For children, life is a chain of continuous changes. Finding rules, structure, logic and sense only promotes the fear of change and blocks the eyes from seeing options. In every period, I think I had more rules to live by and at the same time felt it was much harder to let go of them and allow the stream to take me to fascinating destinations I could hardly imagine.
I love birthdays and special events because they are great points to think again about this. In my calendar, I happily write special events in the life of our family and close friends. Through these events, I remember that there is no reason for being here without purpose.
Yearly assessments are great checking points. My birthdays are opportunities to check my achievements in the last year and the love I have for myself. Birthdays are opportunities to check my parenthood and the love I have for my kids. Our anniversaries are opportunities to check my relationship with Gal and the love I have for him. In that sense, it is great to have a big family.
In the coming months, we have two events that are wonderful checkpoints for us as individuals, partners, parents and coaches.
This month, Gal and I are celebrating 27 years of friendship. Every year, we
celebrate our achievements, get rid of the things we do not like and explore new
streams on the river of life. Relationships play a major part in our purpose. We
believe that life's ultimate purpose is to establish excellent relationships
with ourselves and others. All our clients - the young ones, their parents, the
old ones, the men and women, the business owners - deep inside, they are all
searching for a way to communicate with themselves and with others. Just like
all of us, they have spent many years of their lives mastering the acquisition
of knowledge rather then the thing that will determine their happiness in life -
their relationships with themselves and with others. Most of us have spent over
12 years of our life learning how to learn. Do we need 12 years to learn how to
relate? Well, no! Life coaching is a fast course in relationships. Even in a
business environment, the success of a business is determined by the
relationships among team members, service providers, managers and customers.
Events in a person's life and in the business are good checkpoints for assessing
relationships. It is like looking at the mirror every day, without being able to
see the changes from yesterday. Taking snapshots and revisiting them from time
to time makes it easier to see progress.
Add as many events into your calendar, every day you can celebrate your achievements from the previous day.
Write a success journal. Have a book where you write every day or so, just a few words to describe your thoughts, feelings, successes and events. It describes the growth you have made. Your journal is a wonderful snapshot tool.
Remember: It is all about your relationship with yourself or others. Master relationships!
Dream! Inside your dreams lies your purpose. Live with a purpose.
Add any success from your journal into your event calendar. Aim for an event a day and watch your calendar filling up with events until every day will be a celebration.
Write the 16/10/05 book launch in your calendar and come!
The second event is kind of a funny event. For all of you readers who have kids, you know that raising kids is a perpetual event. Do you remember your child's first year when someone asked you how old he or she was and you said "4 months and 4 days"? In our house, every day is a birthday. Every day is good enough to celebrate the birth of a love that was not there before they arrived. Well, in these constant birthdays, our daughter is going over her exams of grade 12 and we find ourselves assessing our parenthood with no connection to her birthdates or the scores she gets on her finals. We have summarized her education and discussed the celebrations and the frustration we had over the last 16 years, preparing ourselves for a period when she determines her own path in life. Then another coincidence happened to us. Her English teacher gave the class an assignment to write an essay about their discourses in life: their values, attitudes and beliefs. With her permission, I am sharing our celebration with you all.
This I Believe
- Eden Baras (age 16, Year 12 English assignment)
I believe in FAMILY. The healing power of Mum's hands
I believe in having fun and enjoying life
I believe a good book can work wonders when I'm sad or angry
I believe watermelon is the best
I believe that singing along to a good song can cheer me up anytime and that
people are predominantly good, no matter what anyone else says
I believe my sister is the cutest being on Earth and my brother is a genius
I believe in true friends and honesty
I believe it's all about motivation
I believe in subjectivism because who else's eyes can you see things through?
I believe in morals and good upbringings
I believe you can choose your destiny and that the glass is usually 'half-full'
I believe in the importance of good self-esteem and individual style
I believe everyone is different, but I believe that's a good thing 'cause
otherwise life would be kind of boring
I believe the world is a big place and there's heaps of it I have yet to explore
I believe you can do anything, if only you believe and that dad is always there for me,
no matter what.
You see, 16 years ago, I had no idea where the stream will take me. In order to remember her crawling on the floor and drinking from a baby bottle, I have to look at photos. Only then can I see that every day of our children's life can be proudly celebrated. Their successes are ours therefore can be added into our calendar of events, to get closer to our goal of every day is a celebration day.
Count your blessings. Write a list of things you are grateful for and look at them from time to time to add, change or celebrate them.
What you think on the inside is reflected on the outside, whether you like it or not.
Add events in your children's life into your calendar. It will create more family celebrations. This is an alignment of values. It is called "bonding".
Celebrate! Any excuse will do.
Until next time, Be Happy in Life and Celebrate!
Ronit Baras is an Educator, Journalist, Author, Life Coach and a presenter specializing in Emotional Intelligence. Ronit is the founder of the Be Happy in LIFE program
Contributor: Ronit Baras
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