changingminds.org

How we change what others think, feel, believe and do

 

Disciplines

 

Techniques

 

Principles

 

Explanations

 

Theories

 

 

Home

 

Blog!

 

Quotes

 

Guest articles

 

Analysis

 

Books

 

Help us

 

Links

 

 

Please help
and share:

 

Obligation principle

 

Principles > Obligation principle

Principle | How it works | So what?
 

Principle

People will do thing that they feel obliged to do, whether they want to do them or not.

How it works

When I feel obliged to help you, I sense a powerful internal tension that can only be relieved when I discharge that obligation.

Obligation is often so strong that the person to whom a person is obliged is able to make specific requests that the person who is obliged must fulfil.

In many ways, obligation is a deeper principle than friendship, reciprocity or exchange, as it is the force that underpins each of these other drivers.

Rights and duties

A fundamental belief that many people have is that some people have rights and that others have duties towards them. For example children have rights and parents have duties towards their children. Likewise citizens have rights which the government has a duty to uphold. Citizens also have duties as defined by governments.

Some people are more duty-bound than others, but when we feel a sense of duty we also feel a strong compulsion to perform and discharge that duty.

Families often have a strong sense of duty to one another (and children seem to believe they have quite significant rights). There is a saying 'blood is thicker than water' and familial obligation is indeed a significant force.

Reciprocity

In the Reciprocity Norm, when one person does something for another person, that other person has a social debt to repay. The problem with reciprocity is that exactly what must be repaid is unclear and the obliged person can ask for far more than they gave. This is perhaps because they have proved themselves caring and trusting, which obliges the other person to act likewise.

Contract

Obligations are also set in place by contracts, whether they are legal or social. When I agree to do something then I am obliged to do so. Contracts are often set in place with a binding ritual whereby each person swears to fulfil their obligations and may sign a document to confirm this. Marriage, for example, comes with many obligations, from mutual support to fidelity.

So what?

Find out how duty-bound people are and what they believe are their duties, then reframe what you want doing as a duty to others (children often manipulate their parents in this way, as do spouses with one another).

You can also leverage the reciprocity norm by first doing something for the other person, then asking for what you seek from them.

At the very least, you can make a formal agreement.

See also

Exchange principle, Reciprocity Norm, Pregiving

Theories about conforming

 

More Kindle books:

And the big
paperback book


Add/share/save:


 

 


Save the rain


 

 


SalesProCentral

 

Contact Caveat About Students Webmasters Awards Guestbook Feedback Sitemap Changes

 

 

Quick links

Disciplines

* Argument

Brand management

* Change Management

Coaching
+
Communication

Counseling

Game Design

+ Human Resources

+ Job-finding

* Leadership

Marketing

Politics

+ Propaganda

+ Rhetoric

* Negotiation

* Psychoanalysis

* Sales

Sociology

+ Storytelling

+ Teaching

Warfare

Workplace design

 

Techniques

+ Assertiveness

* Body language

* Change techniques

* Closing techniques

+ Conversation

Confidence tricks

* Conversion

* Creative techniques

* General techniques

+ Happiness

+ Hypnotism

+ Interrogation

* Language

+ Listening

* Negotiation tactics

* Objection handling

+ Propaganda

* Problem-solving

* Public speaking

+ Questioning

Using repetition

* Resisting persuasion

+ Self-development

Sequential requests

Stress Management

* Tipping

Using humor

* Willpower

Principles

+ Principles

Explanations

* Behaviors

+ Beliefs

Brain stuff

Conditioning

+ Coping Mechanisms

+ Critical Theory

+ Culture

Decisions

* Emotions

Evolution

Gender

+ Games

Groups

+ Identity

+ Learning

Meaning

Memory

Motivation

+ Models

* Needs

+ Personality

+ Power

* Preferences

+ Research

Relationships

+ SIFT Model

+ Social Research

Stress

+ Trust

+ Values

Theories

* Alphabetic list

* Theory types

 


  Changing Minds 2002-2013

  Massive Content -- Maximum Speed

TOP