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Closing the conversation
Techniques > Conversation techniques > Closing the conversation
If some people find it difficult to start a conversation and others find problems keeping it going, it can also be difficult to close a conversation so you can either move to another topic or move away to talk with someone else.
Closing down a conversation can also seem like bad manners. To interrupt and walk away from somebody might make you wonder if they will think badly of you for this terrible social act. In practice, if you do it well, you will only leave them with a warm glow.
- Be negative: Be generally negative and poor company.
- Body pointing: Pointing your body away from the other person.
- Caught short: Say you need to go to the toilet.
- Closed questions: Create short answers.
- Declare completion: Say that the conversation is ended.
- Excuse yourself: Just excuse yourself and leave.
- Feign ignorance: Be unable to answer their questions.
- Introduce a friend: So you can excuse yourself.
- Out of time: Have another appointment.
- Phone calls: Use the phone to call you away.
- Procrastinating: Putting discussion off to another time.
- Short answers: That give no reason to extend.
- Slow down: De-accelerate to a standstill.
- Spot a friend: Wave to a friend and go to see them.
- Summarize: Describe the essence of what has been said.
You can also ease the closing of a conversation by only joining groups of people, rather than going up to individuals standing alone. This makes it easier to excuse yourself and move on.
When others try to close
A useful additional note is to watch for these methods being used by other people. When they are trying to close the conversation you can gain social credit by noticing this and gracefully letting them go.
I can see you need to leave. Go on -- I'm just fine.
If it is important for you to continue the conversation (for example if you are selling something), then other people trying to close down can be used in two ways. First, it is a signal to you that you are probably not getting through to them, and you should the perhaps change your tactics. You can also use the fact they they want to leave as a lever, letting them go only when you get what you want from them. Their desperation may well let you get what you want with a simple request. Children use this when they know their parents are worn down and trying to get some peace.
Can I go to see Janak tonight, please.
See also
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