How we change what others think, feel, believe and do

Resist Persuasion

Techniques > Willpower > Resist Persuasion

Description | Example | Discussion | See also

Description

A useful way of building your willpower is to deliberately find ways to resist persuasion.

When others try to impose their will on you, push back, using your will to counteract their attempt to coerce you. As with other exercises, start small and work up, for example:

• Go to a shop and resist the sales person's attempts to sell something to you.
• Say no when your partner asks you to do something you do not want to do.
• Resist the efforts of your children to be given treats without have earned them.
• Walk along paths in a straight line so others have to get out of the way rather than you doing the dodging all the time.
• Ask the boss why they want you do things, rather than saying 'yes' to everything. Also when you are busy, ask them what you should stop doing so you can comply with the new request. Perhaps also argue the case for doing things differently.

Example

A timid teenager decides to fight back against the bullies. At first their responses are laughed at. But this only makes them more determined. Eventually the bullies give up and go looking for an easier target.

After several disappointments, a young woman learns to resist the charm of confident young men and go talk to the quieter, more considerate guys.

Discussion

There are many methods for resisting persuasion that you can use, from just saying no to distracting the person with others thoughts.

The first stage of resistance is often to pause and think what you want to do rather than automatically agreeing. It is too easy to get into a habit of saying 'yes' even before you really know what you are agreeing to.

See also

Resisting persuasion