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'Save me' Game

 

Explanations > Behaviors > Games >  'Save me' Game

Purpose | Game play | Discussion | So what?

  

Purpose

Primary: Rescue

Secondary: Comfort

Game play

  • A gets into a situation where they do not feel safe.
  • A appeals to B to be saved.
  • B rescues them.

Discussion

The 'Save me' game goes back to early childhood, where the infant is left by itself and, feeling the pain and loneliness of separation, cries for its mother. The mother returns and sweeps the child into her arms, restoring the comfort of one-ness.

The pattern later repeats with father, whose dangerous strength is turned safely to one's own purpose in rescue from the pickles of childhood.

And so in later life, being saved triggers early feelings of warmth and comfort. This leads some people into patterns of putting themselves in some danger (real or imagined) and appealing to others to rescue them.

So what?

People who need to be rescued may be easily persuaded to do things in return for being saved.

People who are obsessive about being saved can become troublesome as they demand to be saved even more in return for what they do for you.

See also

The Drama Triangle, 'Poor me' Game, 'Recognize me' Game

 

Eric Berne, (1964), Games People Play: The Psychology of Human Relationships, Balantine Books

Thomas Harris (1996), I'm OK-You're OK, Avon books

 

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