changingminds.org

How we change what others think, feel, believe and do

| Menu | Quick | Books | Share | Search | Settings |

Compliment

 

Techniques General persuasionKellerman and Cole's 64 Strategies > Compliment

Description | Example | Discussion | See also

 

Description

Get others to comply with your request by telling them how good they are at what they do.

Be genuine in your praise, complimenting them on things they really are good at. This will require you to be observant and considerate. Link the praise to the action that you want them to undertake.

Example

You're good at this. Could you lend me a hand?

You're the IT expert around here. Can you help with my computer?

Could I ask your advice on this? I need some clear thinking. 

Discussion

When we compliment people, they feel good about themselves and what they do. This makes them more relaxed, open and confident, and so more ready to help others. When you believe you are good at something, you do not fear failure and so have no need to avoid it.

Compliments also create reciprocity, where our being kind to them makes them want to be kind to us in return. In effect, when we compliment in persuasion we are giving them good feelings in exchange for compliance with our requests.

One of the sincerest compliments is just to ask advice. You do not need to flatter them first. Just ask for their opinion. Most people are, nevertheless, flattered to think that their opinion counts.

Compliment is the 14th of the 64 compliance-gaining strategies described by Kellerman and Cole.

See also

Flattery, Exchange principle, Obligation principle

 

Kellermann, K. & Cole, T. (1994). Classifying compliance gaining messages: Taxonomic disorder and strategic confusion. Communication Theory, 1, 3-60

 

Site Menu

| Home | Top | Quick Links | Settings |

Main sections: | Disciplines | Techniques | Principles | Explanations | Theories |

Other sections: | Blog! | Quotes | Guest articles | Analysis | Books | Help |

More pages: | Contact | Caveat | About | Students | Webmasters | Awards | Guestbook | Feedback | Sitemap | Changes |

Settings: | Computer layout | Mobile layout | Small font | Medium font | Large font | Translate |

 

You can buy books here

More Kindle books:

And the big
paperback book


Look inside

 

Please help and share:

 

Quick links

Disciplines

* Argument
* Brand management
* Change Management
* Coaching
* Communication
* Counseling
* Game Design
* Human Resources
* Job-finding
* Leadership
* Marketing
* Politics
* Propaganda
* Rhetoric
* Negotiation
* Psychoanalysis
* Sales
* Sociology
* Storytelling
* Teaching
* Warfare
* Workplace design

Techniques

* Assertiveness
* Body language
* Change techniques
* Closing techniques
* Conditioning
* Conversation
* Confidence tricks
* Conversion
* Creative techniques
* General techniques
* Happiness
* Hypnotism
* Interrogation
* Language
* Listening
* Negotiation tactics
* Objection handling
* Propaganda
* Problem-solving
* Public speaking
* Questioning
* Using repetition
* Resisting persuasion
* Self-development
* Sequential requests
* Storytelling
* Stress Management
* Tipping
* Using humor
* Willpower

Principles

* Principles

Explanations

* Behaviors
* Beliefs
* Brain stuff
* Conditioning
* Coping Mechanisms
* Critical Theory
* Culture
* Decisions
* Emotions
* Evolution
* Gender
* Games
* Groups
* Habit
* Identity
* Learning
* Meaning
* Memory
* Motivation
* Models
* Needs
* Personality
* Power
* Preferences
* Research
* Relationships
* SIFT Model
* Social Research
* Stress
* Trust
* Values

Theories

* Alphabetic list
* Theory types

And

About
Guest Articles
Blog!
Books
Changes
Contact
Guestbook
Quotes
Students
Webmasters

 

| Home | Top | Menu | Quick Links |

© Changing Works 2002-
Massive Content — Maximum Speed