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Evolutionary Drivers

 

Explanations > Evolution > Evolutionary Drivers

Men | Women | Children | So what?

 

Evolution has provided a number of drivers for men and women that act like needs, where satisfying the needs leads to pleasant feelings (or at least relief from bad ones).

This basic principle of using needs can be used in all kinds of changing of minds, as these are deeply programmed drivers. 

Men

Men need to attract females and so must demonstrate they are virile, and can protect and feed their families. They also need to beat other men to get to the most fertile-looking women (which they interpret as beauty).

Men hence need:

  • Strength, speed and dexterity (to win fights and in hunting)
  • Aggression and the will to dominate others (to avoid fighting by showing readiness)
  • Visual-spatial skills (for fighting and hunting)
  • Cunning and intelligence (to deceive, plan and persuade)
  • Readiness to take risks and show willingness to do this (for hunting, fighting and avoiding fighting)
  • Some sensitivity (to show they will not harm their friends and family)

Men tend to avoid debilitating emotions such as sadness and fear whenever they can, as this makes them look strong and prevents weakness in a fight.

Women

Women need to attract males and so have to demonstrate fertility and the ability to raise children. If the man is dominant, then the woman must also be able to take a strong position beside him. Being weaker, she also needs to be able to get on with people, including other women in the tribe.

Women hence need:

  • To appear healthy and attractive
  • To be on good terms with others
  • Empathy and the ability to read others
  • Effective and influential use of language
  • Safety (for self and children)

Children

Children also have needs. In particular, as they are rather vulnerable, they need care and protection.

In general, they need:

  • To gain attention and help when needed.

  • To be fed.

  • To be protected and kept safe.

  • To learn how to survive.

So what?

When interacting with men, women and children, use these different drivers to customize what you say in order to get attention and change minds.

See also

Gender, Beauty, Needs

 

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